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The People We Call Home: How Friendships Become Chosen Family

They were just classmates, roommates, or colleagues. Then, through shared experiences, they became your people—your chosen family.
By Thea Alexandra Divina / Julianne Borje

The People We Call Home: How Friendships Become Chosen Family

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With summer vacation just a few months away, students get a break from early morning alarms and school routines. For some, it’s also a time slip towards graduation and into a whole new chapter of modern independence.

The transition from school to adulthood is a defining moment, where friendships often shift from casual companionships to something deeper – chosen families that provide emotional and practical support in the outside world.

The concept of “chosen family” has become increasingly relevant in today’s world, where young adults seek deeper, more intentional connections beyond their biological families.

This isn’t to say that traditional family structures aren’t valuable – they hold their own significance in shaping a person’s life. But for many, friendships built on shared experiences provide a unique sense of understanding, acceptance, and reliability.

Chosen families come in various forms – school barkadas who stick together through life’s ups and downs, even when time and circumstance test their bond; roommates who evolve from simply sharing a space to becoming kindred spirits; colleagues who grow into trusted confidants. These relationships play a crucial role in navigating adulthood, forming an intimate circle of support that transcends blood ties.

In today’s digital age, connection extends beyond physical proximity – group chats, video calls, and social media interactions help maintain strong bonds, allowing chosen families to remain close despite geographical distance.

However, in a world full of doubts and uncertainties, not everyone finds their chosen family instantly, and that’s okay. It takes time to build deep, meaningful, genuine relationships, and friendships based on trust and mutual support.

In order to cultivate your inner circle, be mindful of the following: be intentional, communicate openly, embrace vulnerability, support each other’s growth, and keep in mind quality over quantity.

At the end of the day, these relationships make all the difference. They’re the people we lean on, celebrate with, and grow alongside.

As Meredith and Cristina from Grey’s Anatomy would say, “You’re my person”. It’s not just about friendships; it’s about finding the people who feel like home, the ones who help you become a better person and not tolerate whatever faults or toxic traits that may cloud your sense of rationality; they’re the ones who pick you, choose you, and love you no matter what.